Siri, I am so, so sorry.
I missed telling our readers about your birthday yesterday, even after I took some amazing screenshots where you and I talked about how you were now five years old. You really don't look a day over three!
Anyway, I didn't get you anything...except that new iPhone 7 Plus to hang out in, and we now talk all the time on my iMac and Apple Watch, so hopefully you'll forgive me for not telling everyone. OK?
Siri? Hello? Um, why did you just erase all of my appointments? Siri? Siri??!